Tag Archives: Beyonce

Looking Through Her Lens (My Thoughts on LEMONADE)

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“In the perspective of every person lies a lens through which we may better understand ourselves”- Ellen Langer

So I know that you have already read a number of articles about Beyoncé and Lemonade and I am sorry to add to your list, but I guess I am sorry not sorry. Because I will tell you… it wasn’t easy to decide what to write about, there were several angles to come at this piece. I read several articles about this and that, about infidelity and Jay-Z, Black women empowerment, feminism and even that Beyoncé is no role model based on her lyrics (and there were some questionable lyrics), but I am sure they had some purpose, for HER. And this makes sense, as with a movie, a good book, or album, people can watch, read or listen to the exact same thing and walk away with a complete different interpretation. But let’s be clear the whole album is for Beyoncé, and certain parts are for our enjoyment.

I believe this is true for any real artist, and I am sure there are people who think Beyoncé is a manufactured robot whose sole purpose in life is to brainwash and make millions. But for the purpose of this post and my  satisfaction, I am writing from the viewpoint that Beyoncé is an artist and she paid top dollar for her writers to construct the lyrics to match her visual masterpiece that is LEMONADE. (I would say it’s not a masterpiece musically because just listening to the tracks it is not her best, but we can debate that at a later time.)

So as I sat down, I was trying to be polite with my thoughts, but I felt pretty strong about some comments and critiques such as the following, as tweeted by Azealia Bank’s herself.

Exhibit A – “You keep crying over a man and perpetuating that sad black female sufferance and it’s not good for what we’re trying to accomplish here”

Exhibit B – “You been singing about this n****a for years and he still playing you. That’s not strength, that’s stupidity”

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Just stop.

Azealia’s tweets are coupled with several comments of sarcasm that I heard from others, such as “poor ole Beyoncé singing the blues”, “oh, her life must be so hard” –

Seriously?

Okay, look, no one is saying that Beyoncé’s life is hard, but does that mean she can’t talk about the issues that she is having with Jay-Z. Azealia’s tweets and those comments completely miss the complexity of the role of women in the 21st century. When you have to balance a husband, kids and a career. The reason more women, of all races and ages, loved it, is that Beyoncé struggled (and is struggling) with the same shit as we all do and she is the “baddest bitch in the game”. But her being the baddest doesn’t change the fact that a man can (and probably will) betray your trust whether it is infidelity or something monetary or when something equally intimate is taken for granted. There are so many ways to be betrayed.

The reality is that our families, especially our significant others or our companions, deeply influence our everyday life and it’s hard. So to invalidate her feminism “cred” because she opens up about her struggles with a lying (maybe cheating) husband is like the opposite of feminism.

We, as group of people, who support the political, social, and economic equality of women, cannot be upset or frustrated that Beyoncé felt betrayed and felt the need to make music about it. For centuries, women have had to fight with decision of staying or leaving, heck, probably a few millennia! I mean who could forget how Adam was quick to throw shade in the Garden of Eden because Eve gave him the piece of fruit that caused him to sin:

Then the man said, “The woman whom YOU gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” – Gensis 3:12

See, men have been making excuses since the beginning of time. That isn’t changing.

So as a 30 year old woman with friends at different stages of their romantic life: single, married for years, newlyweds, divorcees, and even windows, regardless of whether they are successful professionally, or kick ass mothers, their relationships are a priority, so why would it be different for Beyoncé? Not for one second, would I agree with the critiques about HOW anti-feministic it is that she is whining and crying about her husband cheating. I mean I guess she could be quiet, and be damned nonetheless like Hillary Clinton, who stayed extremely quiet about Bill’s infidelity and her struggles until recently during her campaign and people have always talked about her silence. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

The reality is not about whether Beyoncé is weak or not, but we are actually uncomfortable with the honestly of Beyoncé’s album. Even for people who liked and admired it. It makes us all a little uncomfortable, in this male dominated world, that Beyoncé felt that she:

  • could openly critique a man directly, who is as equally successful;
  • felt betrayed and stay; AND
  • told the world all about it.

I didn’t walk away from Beyoncé ‘s album with a sad black suffrage vibe, did you?  I kind of felt like it was more  along these lines:

Life is hard.

Love is hard.

Money, fame, and beauty doesn’t make life easier.

That is really what she is trying to say in between her anger. The first thing I really thought about when I finished the album, was whether it was therapeutic for her? Was it part of her healing and recovery? Not to mention a lyrical guide for all the other women who are dealing with similar issues in their marriages, maybe Beyoncé wanted to bring them some comfort to her struggles. To be silent no more, and talk about how crazy she felt about her situation.

But in reality, we just saw misery, the heartache was so appetizing, especially when it’s not our own, and let it be a celebrity. We were less concerned what it meant for Beyoncé and the fact that we should be happy that we got to witness it.

So you can think she has nothing to complain about, but I think it doesn’t matter how perfect we want life to be, it will never be, and when life is falling apart, you find out –  some people will revel in it, shame you for your life falling apart, and only  a few will support you in it. But you will have to walk through that journey step by step nevertheless. No one can escape it including Beyoncé .

In closing, if Beyoncé can’t talk about Feminism and she can’t talk about Black Lives Matter, what makes her unfit to talk about relationships? To often she is seen and not heard, and when she decided to share her voice candidly about her man, in a male-dominated world, it wasn’t just the men who had a problem. It was women speaking much louder as if we all don’t struggle with feeling appreciated, loved, and supported. Even the BEST man will let you down at least once. Because we are human, and no one is perfect. So stop acting like you didn’t see a little of yourself through Beyoncé’s lens.

Stop trying to brush the shame under the rug. Embrace it, and move on.

M/P

Moving the Needle

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“If you don’t like what you’re doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove.” – Timothy Leary 

Today I was determined to get a blog post done.

I feel like a caged bird, and I haven’t had a chance to sing, so I am going to write a few paragraphs about what’s been going on in my head since I’ve been missing in action. Beyonce’s Formationmade headlines, a few (or quite a few) Republican candidates finally dropped out, there’s been a mass millennial revolt against Hillary, and I can’t help but notice the story that hits me to the core… my favorite player, Peyton Manning, may or may not be a good guy… who knows? (Kanye and Kendrick get honorable mentions for doing what they do best, Kanye made headlines for being crazy and Kendrick for a compelling performance at the Grammys) … Of course, I do not have time to write about all of these things, and there are plenty of other issues brewing, such as Trump’s unwavering support. He attacked the Pope ya’ll.

However, as I thought about these headlines and our continued infatuation with celebrity, I couldn’t help but think of the term, “moving the needle”.  The literal definition is referring to the needle on a measurement instrument such as a scale, compass, speedometer, etc. On a scale, your weight makes a significant difference and moves the needle, or like your foot on a gas pedal. Now, the expression, “moving the needle” for the purpose of this post refers to our internal compass, and how does the needle move, what makes a significant difference in its movement? Where do we stand morally, personally, spiritually, or even professionally? We each have one that dictates the decisions that we make, the people we befriend, and even where we spend our money. We inform our compass through experiences, information, and things that we see through our eyes. In my mind, our compass should not be quickly moved based on external factors.

BUT….

At this point in our society, with the Twitterverse, THE Facebook, snapchat, and the other million ways, we have several touch points for our minds with images, words and videos that inform our mindset, our decisions and most of all, our internal compass. Once upon a time, people had more time to hear something, read something and have time to PROCESS information at a slower pace. At this ancient time, people were slower to move the needle to their moral compass, right? Public and personal opinion was not quickly altered based on 140 characters. Mistakes essentially can’t be made, because we have zero tolerance, moving the needle is easy. It’s as if a significant difference can be based on something so small.

But why?  It’s more than instant gratification. Well, unless making decisions or forming opinions instantaneously brings you some form of pleasure, it is more than that. The definition of a decision is “a conclusion or resolution reached after consideration”. But we are failing to take time to think and have the “after consideration” part. We decide and think later, and sometimes maybe never. And by the time, one person makes a hasty decision, there are flocks of “robots” ready to follow.

But how did we get here? Because we have always been there. GOTCHA! I know right, when I started doing research into ancient democracies, I find that each generation, maybe in a different form have struggled with the thoughts of a few dictated the moves of the masses. Democracy doesn’t discriminate against who the people listen to, it’s just tradition that the smartest, loudest, and sometimes most well-spoken and richest grab the attention of the masses… as it did in ancient Greece:

“Of this group, perhaps as few as 100 citizens – the wealthiest, most influential, and the best speakers – dominated the political arena both in front of the assembly and behind the scenes in private conspiratorial political meetings (xynomosiai) and groups (hetaireiai). Critics of democracy, such as Thucydides and Aristophanes, also pointed out that the dēmos could be too easily swayed by a good orator or popular leaders (the demagogues) and get carried away with their emotions. Perhaps the most famous bad decision from the Athenian democracy was the death sentence given to the philosopher Socrates in 399 BCE.” – (source )

So we have always been here. In democracy, the wealthiest, most influential, and the best speakers are heard. So this is why Donald Trump is here. Bernie is here. And even Beyoncé. The world was in a frenzy with Queen Bey, because often black stars and athletes aren’t able to use their platforms in the same capacity. Because we (America) are not used to listening despite having wealth and influence. Case and point: Oprah. If we look at Oprah’s effect on Barack Obama’s campaign in 2007, her influence was huge (source), yet she rarely wields her expertise in this area. Although it is old news, I remember her being heavily criticized for coming out and supporting Obama, yet she had a heavy influence on so many other areas of American life. Just google Oprah and her influence and see what you find. So why not in the political arena? Not that I personally want her there (not a fan), but if the Koch Brothers can do it, why not her? I digress.

Another example, 8 months before the Supreme Court decided to legalize gay marriage, the most powerful man in the Tech world, Tim Cook, CEO of Apple, wrote a piece in the Bloomberg Business Week called, spelling out that he was gay. (source). Now it’s easy to say, Barack wouldn’t have won without Oprah’s influence, and the Supreme Court was likely going to pass the legislation regardless of any outside force as they are supposed to do. But I think we would be naïve to believe that our leaders, in any industry, affect policy, because the reality is that they do, and it is important for us to understand, believe, and hold our leaders accountable for speaking for us.

I definitely have come around to this notion (read my old blog posts), because I personally want to believe that people should be of their own mind, and not be influenced by others, but history would tell us this is a lie. There is a responsibility for the populous, for us to be informed, so that we can make smarter decisions about who we choose to follow, but people with money, power and influence must be responsible with their actions. We need our leaders to move the needle. But intentionally and deliberately. I cannot not write enough posts about how we need to be paying attention to this upcoming election, Republicans and Democrats, and we should drive the issues that matter to us. I think Donald Trump is a baboon, but the people he’s speaking for are out there screaming and supporting him. Bernie and Hillary are talking about black lives, because of the Black Lives Matter. So yeah… let’s get with it, and move the needle.

I’m Back, move the needle with me.

M/P

Four Women That I Know

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“Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.” – Helen Keller

I have been working on a post about women and the strength of our relationships for quite some time. (Seriously, like 6+ months) I’ve gone back and forth between several themes, and couldn’t settle on just one. The idea of a strong ancestral matriarch, where I roar, is my go to choice.  The women who’ve come before me roared and as a descendant of those strong women, I am strong. But I wasn’t feeling it. Other times, I want to write to women that we have a responsibility to support each other first and foremost and not play second fiddle to our relationships to the opposite sex. How women relate to each other shouldn’t be dictated by this male dominated system.  For instance, the idea that women should forego our innate womanhood to support each other simply win over the attention and affection of the opposite sex. But, yeah, I wasn’t really feeling that either. Last and definitely the least, the topic on balancing our time between female friends and male friends has been done to death.

In my heart of hearts, I really want to talk about four women that I know.  I haven’t been able to write about them, despite several attempts, because my pen to the pad couldn’t quite capture their story, their lives, and their struggles.  They are so diverse in ethnic groups, ages, careers, and societal roles.  The four women I know aged with wisdom, seasoned with laughter, and equipped with love.

Sometimes words can’t encompass the most precious things in life. You must experience it and it must be felt. When you enter into their house, you can feel the love. One of my favorite lines from a Toby Mac song is, “When love is in the house, the house is packed”, and their house can get very packed, because they let people in with open arms. I am never ashamed to take someone to meet these four women that I know.

As I sit here, I am in that house, of these four women bonded by sisterhood that blood could never have forged, but of life and circumstances brought them together. I’m forever indebted to these four women, one who is my “real” aunt, but all of them, are family.  When I was broken, they loved me back to life with their generosity, but most of all their spirit of kindness and love. You can fake a lot of things, but a true spirit of kindness is hard to mimic.

So when I stop to think about these four women who roar, they roar mightily, but not in the way you would think. You would never hear, because the roar is not loud or boastful, it is in the small things that show they really matter. And each one has a unique roar that form harmony in their universe.  As a daughter of a science teacher, I couldn’t help but to describe their qualities to the elements of nature: Fire, Water, Earth, and Air.

Fire – One is like fire which associated with energy, assertiveness, and passion. She is the spark, full of life and energy, with an extra dose of spunk. There are days the fire shines brighter than others, but the best quality is that she is always warm. Her heart warms the soul of anyone who comes close.

Water – I think there are several ways to look at water, but for me, I believe the two things I love most about water is its calmness but even more so its steadiness. Although constantly, moving and changing, water is a steady, calming force the nurtures the soul when things are dry and brittle. She rises early and calmly to not disturb anyone who is slumbering about. All of her manners are calming from her speech to reading.

Earth – is associated with the qualities of patience, thoughtfulness, practicality, and hard work. It is seen nurturing and seeks to draw all things together with itself, in order to bring harmony and rootedness.  She tends to mother anyone in her orbit. Her decisions are for the good of everyone. She has weathered many storms which allow her sound advice to be valued.

Air- One of the most important elements in life, it is necessary for survival or we would all perish. It fits into the nooks and crannies and fills the open space, it knows where the breaks and cracks are in a foundation. Air is also about movement. She is always on the move as she goes about making the environment comfortable for everyone.

These elements have the ability to destroy as well to heal and soothe. They have chosen to use their superpowers for good.

That pretty much sums them up: Warmth, Steadiness, Strength, and Harmony

So I don’t get to visit these four women as often as I would like, but whenever I tell people, I’m going to visit my 4 aunties, sometimes people get confused. I do have 7 aunts. I sometimes have to break it down, and people will reply, “So you’re Aunt lives with 3 roommates?” But its so much more than that. I am going to visit my 4 Aunts. So, I guess I have 10 aunts.  I am blessed!

The reality is sometimes people just don’t get it and that’s what I’m really want to write about. Their house is made of love, and it’s different and people don’t always get it, because it’s not normal for 4 grown women to live in a house together after the children are grown, until death did you apart, or divorce. But that’s what is wrong with America these days. For every group, there’s a box, and sometimes people got outside the box to only end up creating another box. So it makes sense when people are confused because people don’t conform.

When things are true, you don’t have to explain it. Often times, the world, friends, co-workers, and even our family want to understand who, what, why, when and where you’re doing something. I’ve learned at some point in life you just have to do what’s best for you and EVERYTHING else is truly background noise. If you are unable to let go of conventions and boxes, you might never find the right fit, and be muddled with unhappiness for most of your life.

These four women I know in a subtle and silent fashion have taught me to be content with myself without being loud and boastful. To just walk in my purpose regardless of who understands and is watching, and that comfort and love will come to you. And that’s what is most important.

In Beyoncé ‘s video Pretty Hurts, she is asked, “Miss 3rd Ward, What is your aspiration in life? and she replies, “To Be Happy” , that rings so true to me. We do anything to be happy, except the one or two things that really makes us happy.

In the New Year, let go of the things that are keeping you from your happiness.

FLAWED: Society’s Critique on Beyonce and Feminism

Bey, Politics, and Feminism “Okay, I promise I’m not a feminist. Well, I mean I am a feminist based on the definition, but I don’t want to be called a feminist, because I’m not a man hating, over-sexed, abortion pushing, I need my birth control free kind of woman,” – For starters, feminism has never been about any of those things, and if you think it is, just stop reading, and go read a history book. Many of those stereotypes have manifested based on actions of a small minority, and many men (and women) choose to focus on negatives and improperly define what a feminist is. However, what’s more frustrating are women and feminists who limit what the definition of a feminist can be;  No one group or person should define what feminism is for everyone.

Cues Beyoncé

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Beyoncé’s performance at the VMAs introduced feminism into everyday conversations on a whole new level for this generation. One of the reasons I personally find the conversations about feminism exhausting at times is everyone wants to start from a different place or definition, including the stereotypes listed in my introductory paragraph. However, the generally accepted definition is simple and straightforward: “feminism is a collection of movements and ideologies aimed at defining, establishing, and defending a state of equal political, economic, cultural, and social rights for women.” (Link)

Feminism isn’t something new, and Beyoncé calling herself a feminist is not new for her. Growing up with Beyoncé, and despite what people want to say, Beyoncé has always been a feminist in her mind, chipping away at the barriers that she faced as a talented black female who embraces her sexuality. Do I like all the images she puts out? No. But does it make her any less of a feminist? Not necessarily.

For a young black woman coming out of Houston with a pursuit of being a star, she has undeniably helped define, establish and defend a state of equality for women who want to be in her position. Too bad it doesn’t apply to everyone, and appeal to everyone, and it shouldn’t. Just like Sheryl Sandberg, a woman I deeply admire, doesn’t have the same view of what being a feminist is, as her experiences are very different from mine, and there are parts of “Lean In”, that I don’t agree with, but I don’t go stomping around saying she’s not a feminist.

Feminism can’t mean the same thing for each person, and we shouldn’t expect it to. Feminism isn’t a cookie-cutter word that can be applied in a perfect little box, and I know that I am not the first person to say that, or have the thought. But yet, we find our selves trying to apply it. Isn’t that why the second-wave of feminism started? Women were tired of their life’s sole purpose was finding a man, becoming a stay at home mom who was dependent on their husbands. Well, there isn’t a problem with being a stay-at-home mom, the problem was that they wanted ALL women to do just that; it’s the same as requiring ALL women to work and not allowing women to stay in their home and raise their children. Its ridiculous, right?

Now I am not trying to over simply feminism as if there weren’t principles that shaped and defined the three movements and some of those principles still reign true.  However, I think feminism has to take a different course. Women are a diverse group of people, and reaching that equality is not the same for all of us. More importantly, we need to stop focusing on what a feminist should look like, and rather seek and find answers for problems that continue to keep us from obtaining equality in certain areas, like… the lack of women in politics.

There is no denying that there are not enough women in office in our state, and national offices for either party. Regardless of whether the numbers of the men to women ratio is contested, when you LOOK at the numbers, it’s quite depressing.

Let’s spit some facts for real quick from 2013: Link

  • Only 18.5% members of Congress are women
  • 20 female senators, or 20% (16 Democrats, 4 Republicans).
  • 79 female Representatives, or 18.2% (60 Democrats, 19 Republicans).
  • In our state legislatures, only 24.1 percent of the legislatures  [Now, that’s for the entire country,  in case you missed it.] Colorado has the highest percentage of females in state legislative office with 41%, while Louisiana has the lowest at 11.1%.

And if we look internationally, in 2014, the United States ranked 84th in worldwide female leadership, which is 15 spots down from 2008 when we were ranking 69th, so it seems like we’ve gotten worse. (Source: Inter-parliamentary Union of Geneva)

The numbers are clear that women are either not running for office or simply not winning elections.  And it is mostly because we can be our own worst enemy. Women candidates are more likely to be scrutinized (by women), receive less donations than their male counterparts (from men, and yeah, women), and generally, have more commentary about their work/life balance; when men are not asked or questioned in that manner at all. Now clearly there are women, who successfully run for office, and win, so why does it matter that we need more women? The age old response is why not have more? But it’s true. We as a sex are in denial that it is okay for us to be less represented. We should be encouraging woman to speak out and up, and actually support them, and it has nothing to do with taking anything from men, but we should want it for ourselves.

For this article, I braved the internet to read “Women against Feminism”, and I’m all for free speech, so no, I don’t think the site needs to come down. But I do believe many of the responses were disturbing, because some of these women are truly misinformed.  There are women day-in and day-out whether in their professional, social, or at-home life that are not treated equally, fighting for their piece of the pie, because there are still real barriers. Just look at Beyoncé?

Beyoncé, love her or hater her, is such a force to be reckoned with, conversations about her success should be able to occur that don’t implicate or attribute a large part of her success in some form to Jay-Z.  Many blame her good girl gone bad switch was based on his corrupting; that her star power would not have reached heights without him; and he truly IS the businessman. And this all may be true, but Beyonce was writing lyrics before she met Jay-Z, Beyoncé’s bank account is bigger, she’s the one performing at the Super Bowl, for the Presidential inauguration, she can sell out her own shows, and can release an album with no publicity and sell millions; yet, we have to find some way to give Jay Z credit some for her success, and all we attribute to Jay-Z’s crossover to mainstream is that Beyoncé changed his sense of style and living habits. And when I say we, I mean these are comments from women, some from feminists! This is because we are systemically flawed.

Women, we have to take what is ours and be proud, and shouldn’t have to be concerned what men or even feminists, are going to say. But most importantly, let’s not put feminism in a box either, because we will never reach equality hiding. Beyonce doesn’t and shouldn’t have to apologize for it.

M/P

Should we care about Mr. Sterling’s Rights? A Question for “Post-Racial” America

By now, the news cycle has almost already forgotten the uproar from the comments released by the media from the billionaire, Donald Sterling, and many in this post-racial America wouldn’t have it any other way. What I found most unnerving about the whole Donald Sterling situation were the comments from a segment of “post-racial” America that we live in; who either sympathized with Mr. Sterling’s privacy rights or took the time to remind us that we “should have known” and should have done something sooner, yet if they knew too, why didn’t they do something too instead of pointing the finger elsewhere. Why are we choosing to get off track, forget the important issues that Mr. Sterling was an empowered racist and sexist, because he didn’t quite say that he couldn’t publicly be seen with blacks (I mean how could he not), but that his mistress (not his legally bound wife) could not be seen with blacks. There are too many pundits that often criticize that blacks are too quick to pull out the race card or make everything about race. So when we have a genuine opportunity to have a real conversation and maybe produce some real action about today’s racism, we choose to focus on other minute points. The reality is there still is this RACIST culture that exists and as Mr. Sterling expressively said, the one he lives in.

There are cries from all kinds of people (including African – Americans), that Mr. Sterling was having a private conversation, and we would all lose our jobs or some friends if people recorded our private conversations, and that maybe true, but is that some type of justification for his comments, or make him any of less of a bigot? No, it shows how he really feels, and unfortunately we live in world where secrets are hard to keep and if Edward Snowden can release thousand of military secrets, including the one where we spy on our friends, our conversations are rarely kept as private. The privacy conversations take away from the fact that A. Mr. Sterling’s behavior was known by a large amount in the L.A. community and around the NBA, and B. the more scary realization, that he made it seem as if he was surrounded by others who think just like him. But why doesn’t this seem to bother anyone? If you think D. Sterling is hanging out with other 81 year olds, who were born in a similar culture, then maybe that’s not so bad, but people like D. Sterling, are hanging out and associating with all kinds of people, what if those thoughts were shared, and others have the same thought: that there’s a place for blacks, but just not an equal place.

Why aren’t we talking about this? Instead of just kicking him out the game so quickly, who else believes just like him, or has the same fears about their mistresses or daughters with black men in public? Society, post-racial America, would have you believe that it is a small number of people like him; but was it also a small number who knew of his bigotry and continued to support him, such as the L.A. NAACP chapter. Or maybe the problem, is that we have come this far, with Obama in the white house, and Beyoncé, Jay-Z, and Oprah running everything in popular culture, what more do we need; Discrimination among the likes of the wealthy and privileged can go untouched, and we will turn our backs to it. I hope not, because the implications go deeper. Because at the end of the day, this racism isn’t bred off of long held stereotypes, misconceptions, but the most basic human nature: power. Which is why it makes sense that the arch – nemesis for Mr. Sterling was none other than Magic Johnson. You know it wasn’t like she was taking a picture with Lil’ Wayne, Rick Ross, or some rapper type, who are successful in their own right, but love to rap about money and hoes, but instead, a VERY successful, black entrepreneur who also owns part of another L.A. sports franchise. When asked, his girlfriend explained quite plainly, that she admired him for the things he had done in the community. Mr. Sterling said Magic too should be admired…. but only in private.

This is where the conversation is my friends, I’d agree, that our generation overall lives in a much more equal America, but lest us not forget our forefathers fought for our freedom and equality, to excel and reach heights that they weren’t able to, not so an owner of predominately black workforce (the players) who makes money off the backs of this said black workforce, and then degrades us by telling his mistress she could sleep, hang out, and be friends with us in private, but she better not be in public with one of the most successful black entrepreneurs who helped change the culture in many black communities. So let me ask, should we really care about protecting his privacy rights or protecting ourselves and other minorities from this nonsense… I’ll take the later post-racial America…. I hope you do too.